


His new past

by LilSisBarton34



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adorable Clint Barton, Cute, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, Kid Clint Barton, M/M, Pietro Maximoff Lives
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:53:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 17,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26843179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilSisBarton34/pseuds/LilSisBarton34
Summary: Tony's been working on a similar serum to Steve's, which should help patients regain youthful health. If he pulls this off thousands of people's lives would be saved but that's not what this stories about. Clint injests some of the serum by accident and the serum doesn't act how it should, Clints turned into a four year old. As Tony and Bruce work on an antidote a certain sonic starts to bond with the boy he despised as an adult. Will the bond they grew be enough to save their relationship when Clints turned back to normal?
Relationships: Clint Barton/Pietro Maximoff
Comments: 6
Kudos: 67





	1. Chapter 1

I stood back and admired my work, I was exhausted from countless weeks of working on the serum with minimum sleep but it was finally finished. I rubbed a hand through my greasy hair and grinned, this could change everything!

"Hey Tony, dinners ready and Steve said if you don't come up to eat he'd drag you up here himself." Clint announced,  
"It's finished..." I muttered feeling like I was gonna drop to the ground from exhaustion,  
I heard Clint walk over and bend down taking a look at the liquid in the vial.  
"Cool man, you should really take a shower though. You smell like dead fish."  
I rolled my eyes as Dumm-E came over, he went to the back of Clint and started speeding right to him. My eyes widened but before I could do anything he crashed into Clint sending him face first into the lab table. There was a loud crash and then I froze, Clint fell on the vial which smashed and spilled onto the table. Clint quickly pulled himself up and looked at me with wide eyes.

"Tony I swallowed some." He said deadly serious with fear creeping onto his features,  
"Shit... I think you'll be okay it's supposed to increase health so... I think you should be okay."  
Then Clints face twisted up in pain and he doubled over, I rushed over to him lowering him to the floor.  
"Fuck, JARVIS alert the others and tell them to get down here as soon as possible!" I yelled checking his pulse.  
His pulse was slightly high but it was there, I cursed as I sat there next to Clint not knowing what to do. Then the door burst open and everyone ran in.  
"Tony what happened?" Steve shouted,  
"Of course Clint managed to get hurt." Nat rolled her eyes,  
I told them about Clint falling and ingesting the serum, then Clint let out a loud groan which made Nats gaze on him soften.  
"Steve get him to my lab, we need to figure out what's wrong with him and fast." Bruce stated calmly,

Steve gently picked up Clint who let out a cry of pain and scrunched his eyes shut tight. I saw Pietro roll his eyes at Clint and cross his arms, Wanda hissed at him in Sokovian and he lowered his gaze to the floor. We followed behind Steve as he walked urgently into Bruce's lab which was full of doctor equipment. Steve set Clint down and Bruce shoved the rest of us out.  
"Give me room to figure out what's wrong guys, Tony go take a shower and a nap, you need it." Bruce instructed before closing the door,   
I took his advice and had a shower which made me feel even sleepier. I collapsed onto my bed only wearing boxers and a t-shirt, as soon as my head hit the pillow I was out like a light.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

"Tony get up! We have a problem!" Nat hissed slapping me,  
"Owww! What the hell was that for?" I yelped sitting up,  
"That's for what you fucking did to Clint!"  
I froze and looked up at her,  
"Oh god is he... is he okay?" I whispered,  
"Get your ass out of bed and see for yourself!"   
I stumbled out of bed and pulled a pair of sweatpants on, a million thoughts of guilt running through my mind. We walked down the hall quickly and got into the elevator which whisked us down to Bruce's lab. We walked out and down a hallway, I saw the others standing outside of Bruce's lab door with stunned looks on their faces. I pushed past them, determined to see if Clint was okay. I opened the door and Bruce stepped aside to let me through, I scanned the room and started to freak out when Clint wasn't on the examining table anymore. I frantically searched the room again until I noticed a small shape in the corner of the room, I walked closer and stopped with my mouth falling open. It was a tiny boy, how did he get in here? He was skinny and had bruises along his arms and legs, he had light brown hair and big grey eyes that stared back at me frightened. I crouched down and gave him a small smile of reassurance, he watched my movements sharply with his body tense as if he was prepared to escape at any second.

"Hey it's okay..." I soothed,  
He continued to stare at me until he unwrapped his skinny arms from around his legs, but what he said next made me freeze.  
"Where's Barney?"


	2. Where am I?

My breathing was ragged as I stared at the man in front of me, he was kneeling down with a look of shock on his face. I just wanted to go home, and I wanted Barney but not my Dad. My Dad hurts me and wouldn't let me eat sometimes, I was really, really hungry. A whimper escaped me and I watched closely to see his reaction, I flinched when he stood back up but he only walked back to the other man in the room. They started talking quietly but I was good at listning and I heard some of what they were saying.  
"JARVIS did a scan, it's Clint... somehow the serum... he's extremely malnourished and has... should we bring Nat in?" 

I hugged my knees again, trying to shrink even further into the corner. I didn't like the sound of what they were talking about. I'm so, so, so hungry. I just want to go home. I felt tears drip down my cheeks and fall onto my knees, the two men looked at me and then one of them disappeared through the door and came back a few minutes later with a red haired woman. She looked mean, she was frowning and had a mean face on. I saw her walk towards me and I readied myself to run, she sat down and looked at me. I looked back at her and we stayed like that for a while. Then she slowly reached her hand out and started drawing shapes on the ground in between us, I followed her hand movements with my eyes, wondering what she was drawing. I saw her watching me out of the corner of my eye and looked back at her. She gave me a small smile and suddenly her mean face wasn't very mean anymore, I gave her a tiny smile back.

"My name is Natasha, what's your name?" She said quietly,  
"Clint." I whispered,  
"Are you hungry?"  
I nodded very fast because I was really, really hungry.  
She took a bar out of her pocket and opened it giving it to me, I grabbed it and starting eating fast. She watched me eat and told me she was just going to get more food, I nodded and finished eating the bar. I felt better now, not as hungry as before. Natasha came back with a juice box and a sandwich, I gratefully took them and started eating the sandwich. I drank the juice and looked back up at Natasha.

"Clint, you're safe okay? You're just gonna be here for a little bit then you can go back home."  
I nodded and looked at her bright red hair, it reminds me of fire, fire and blood. But I think it's nicer to be fire. She reached out her hand and I looked at it for a few seconds, I decided to trust Natasha with the fire hair and a nice face hiding behind her mean one. I took her hand and she helped me stand up, we started walking towards the other man. I tightened my grip on her hand, nervous about him.

"Clint, this is Bruce. He is a very nice man and will make you feel better if you feel sick."  
"Hi..." I said eyeing him,  
He gave me a big smile and took something out of his pocket, he held it out to me and I looked at it.  
"For being such a brave boy you get a sticker!" He said warm and bubbly.  
I smiled taking the dog sticker off of him and held it close to me because I'd never gotten a sticker before.  
"I didn't know you kept stickers in your pockets?" Asked Natasha,  
"You never know when you might need one." He replied,  
"There's some people outside that want to meet you." Natasha said looking down at me,  
I looked up at her worried, why would anyone wanna see me?  
"There really nice people like Bruce, I'm gonna tell them to come in okay?"  
I shook my head but she let go of my hand anyway and went outside to get people, I put my sticker in the pocket of my old blue blue jeans and smoothed down my dirty second hand t-shirt that Barney bought for me. I heard multiple footsteps and snapped my head up, resisting the urge to run and hide. I saw five people walk in with Natasha and I balled my hands into fists trying to keep my breaths even.

"Hey buddy...My name is Steve!" A really tall blonde haired man said with a nice face,  
I just looked down at my broken, muddy sneakers. Then another woman with brown hair and brown eyes with a face full of kindness knelt down beside me.  
"My name's Wanda." She said with a gentle smile,  
I looked into those eyes full of kindness and decided I liked her, I gathered up my courage and was brave.  
"My name's Clint." I said looking at all the other people there.  
They all smiled down at me but there was a man made of winter that had a funny face on him. He had white snow hair and ice eyes that were looking at me not so nicely, I decided I didn't like him very much.  
"How old is He?" Asked Steve while looking at Natasha,  
"Four years old, isn't that right?"   
I nodded and held Natasha's hand again, she gave my hand a little squeeze and I gave her a big squeeze back to show her how strong I was.  
"Well looks like we'll be going shopping tomorrow for the little man."


	3. Finding out truths

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! So thanks for deciding to read my story but a small warning, this chapter does have mentions of abuse in it. If that triggers you please don't read this chapter. Also please, please comment, comments make all the difference and they drive me to make more better chapters!😉  
> ~Lily

I was sitting in a white room, it was super shiny and hurt my eyes. I looked at the clean white bedsheets and the white table beside the bed I was on, Bruce the nice doctor put colouring books and crayons on the table but I hadn't touched them. Natasha with the fire hair and kind eyed Wanda went to buy me clothes, but they'd been gone for a long time. I scrunched my hands into the sheets in sadness, I'd probably been abandoned again. I sighed, I hated being abandoned. My Dad abandoned me once, he drove me into the middle of town and told me if I wanted to go home then I'd have to figure it out. My Dad sure did look surprised when I came home four hours later, he showed me just how angry he was later that night when he punched and kicked me over and over. The door opened and I jumped to my feet eyes trained on the door as I started to hyperventilate, but then Steve walked in.

"Clint... are you okay there?" He asked with a small frown as he studied me,  
I relaxed a little but stayed standing as I traced his movements like a Hawk, he walked over and knelt down.  
"I found this, I thought you might want it!"  
I looked at the bag he was holding and stared at it, deciding whether I should take it or not. I gingerly reached out and grabbed the bag stepping back straight after I did. I peeked inside and gasped, I reached in and took out a stuffed dog. He had soft brown fur with big black spots on him, he had one floppy ear that was completely black and a blue collar, he had a big black nose and a sewn on mouth that was smiling, I traced his shiny blue eyes as I looked at the dog in wonder. I bit my lip and held the dog away from me and tried to give it back to Steve.

"You don't want him?" Steve asked confused,  
"Only good boys get toys and i'm a bad boy." I whispered looking at the ground,  
"Oh Clint... you are not a bad boy, who told you that?"  
"My Dad." I said glaring at the ground as I curled my hands into a fist,  
"Well your Dad was wrong, you are not a bad boy... even if you were you'd still get toys. Everyone deserves to have toys and to play."  
I looked at Steve in shock, everyone gets toys? I felt my eyes start to burn but I forced myself not to cry, crying is a weakness and weaknesses don't belong in my family.  
"So here, he's yours... to keep forever!"

I pulled the dog back to me and hugged him tight to me so no one could steal him, I stuffed my face into him and smelled his soft fur. He smelled like happiness. Then the door opened again and I snapped my head up, hugging my dog even tighter to me. I relaxed a little when I saw Natasha and Wanda come in with lots of shopping bags, my eyes widened as I looked at the bulky bags. Were they all for me? Why did they buy all that stuff, I only need a few outfits. They set the bags on the floor and Wanda gave me a smile full of love and comfort. 

"Did Steve give you that puppy?" Natasha asked with a small smile on her fake mean face.  
I nodded and walked a little closer, trying to peek into the bags. Natasha motioned for me to come over and investigate and I slowly walked over, keeping an eye on where everyone was. I slowly sat down by a bag and Wanda took the clothes out for me to see, my mouth fell open as I stared at the clothes in wonder. They were all bran new! None of them looked old or dirty, they weren't even to big for me! I picked up a tough blue material and held it up seeing it was a pair of overalls with red stars on the knees, I picked up another piece of clothing and saw it was a green t-shirt with dinosaurs on it. I looked up at Steve, Natasha and Wanda and gave them a smile to show them I loved them.

"Choose an outfit to change into after we give you a bath, okay?" Steve ordered gently,  
I nodded and looked through all the other bags, I chose soft brown overalls and a long-sleeved dark blue top that had a black circle on the elbows. Then Natasha took out a pair of purple Velcro shoes that looked bran new and expensive.  
"Hopefully they fit, I wasn't so sure about what size you were since your small for your age..."  
I took the shoes and looked them over, they had white bits at the front and two Velcro straps, the rest was a dark purple. I tried them on and smiled, they were a little big but that was fine. Then Wanda brought me into the bathroom and helped me wash my hair, she looked sad when she saw all the scars on me so I tried to reasure her.  
"It's okay, they don't hurt anymore!"  
But she looked even sadder after I said that so I decided to stop talking, after the bath (Which had bubbles in it!) I changed into the clothes I chose and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked like a new boy, the dirty oversized clothes and pale, dirt coated face was gone replaced with the boy that looked back at me.

"Come on Clint, were gonna bring you to the tower to be with the others." Steve called out,  
"Coming..." I said emotionless, I'd gotten good at hiding my emotions.  
We walked out and Natasha reached out her hand in an invitation to take it, I ignored her and grabbed my dog. We walked out and I noticed we were in a strange hospital, then I saw a pirate wearing a black suit walking straight towards us. He looked REALLY mean.  
"What the hell do you think your doing? Agent Barton stays here until we can turn him back."  
I stared at him, fear slowly taking over my other senses, my breathing became fast and shallow as he started to walk towards me. I took a step back but he grabbed my arm pulling forward. I screamed, pure terror taking over as I yanked my arm out of his grip, I let go of my dog as I ran as fast as I could.  
"Fury! He's a child with a traumatic past, you can't just grab him!" I heard Natasha shout as Steve and Wanda ran after me,  
I pushed myself to go further as my primal senses kicked in and screamed at me to run and hide. What did that man mean when he said Agent Barton? And what are they trying to turn back?  
"Clint! Please come back, your not in danger! The man that grabbed you is actually a good guy." I heard Steve call out,  
Then big arms wrapped around me and I screamed again, kicking and trying to get out of their grasp. They wrapped me up so I couldn't move and tucked me into them.  
"Shhhhh... you're safe Clint. It's just me Steve." He whispered down to me.  
I started to stop fighting against him and finally stilled, a sob escaped me as I cried. I couldn't stop the tears from falling as I cried into Steve, he rocked us back and forth and whispered sweet nothing's. The other three walked up and watched us, then Wanda handed me my dog and I hugged him tight smelling him. I did that weird hiccup thing that happens after you cry and I closed my eyes pretending I was back in my room with Barney, telling me all the adventures we'd have when we ran away.  
"Clint we can see the others another day, okay?" Steve said softly standing up with me still bundled in his arms.  
I nodded and we headed back to the white room that made my eyes hurt.


	4. He's so small

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos, it warms my heart to know people like my story!

Two days. That's how long Clint's been a four year old. A four year old that's the size of a three year old and is covered in bruises. I've always disliked Clint, he was annoying and stubborn as fuck, he would play stupid pranks and throw himself into danger to have just the chance of maybe saving someone. I know I'm a hypocrite for saying these things because I'm some of them... but it's just... different with Clint. I mean, I saved his life when a shower of bullets were coming towards him and he just... braced himself, he was ready to die. I couldn't let that happen. Clint just irks me, I hate how childish he is sometimes. But... I'm starting to rethink this all, Clint was brought back to when he was a four year old. With the same clothes and memories and everything. So why was he covered in bruises and half starved? He didn't grow up in an area of poverty... These last two days have changed the way I see a lot of things. I'm starting to think... that Clint acts childish because... he never got a childhood. He's definitely not a normal child, I could see the hidden fear in his eyes as he gripped onto Nat's hand when we met him, how he was tense as if he expected us to hurt him. I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face. It had been a long two days.

"Pietro, Clint's moving into the tower today so Tony and Bruce can keep an eye on him to see if anything changes." Wanda said, standing in the doorway to my room,  
I nodded and she left, probably to help the others set up Clint's room. I got up and paced around the room a few times, I was torn between helping the others with Clint or staying away from him.  
"He's here." Thor chattered excitedly,  
I cautiously went into the living room and saw Clint sitting on the couch with a stuffed dog in his hands, he was wearing a purple top with kid jeans and purple Velcro shoes. He was scanning the room and the people in it quickly and subtly. He looked so impossibly small sitting on our huge couch, our eyes met and I held his gaze. I gave him the tiniest smile and he watched me before snapping his gaze onto Tony who sat down a fair distance away from him. My eyes roamed over a purple and green bruise that was on his lower cheek and a cut on his temple that had a bandaid on it. He had a nasty looking bruise on the end of his arm and was clutching onto his dog as if he expected one of us to take it away from him.

"Hey squirt, are you hungry?" Tony asked surprisingly gentle with the boy.  
Clint nodded and Bruce went and got him some food set up on a plate, he placed it on the table and beckoned Clint over. Clint stared at the seat, his face expressionless as he slowly stood up. He walked over and stared at the seat, then he took a step back and shook his head.  
"What's wrong?" Thor asked as quietly as he could,  
Clint stayed silent just looking at each of us and then back at the chair, then Nat switched his plate to the other side of the table so his back was against the wall. Then it clicked, Clint wanted to keep all of us in his sight at all times. Clint went and soundlessly sat down, he looked at the food on his plate curiously. He picked up a carrot stick and chewed on it experimentally. He must have decided he liked it because he started eating it normally after that, while keeping an eye on us. I sat on the couch, looking out the window and at the huge city before us. I saw Clint follow my gaze out of the corner of my eye and saw him gasp, eyes going wide. He dropped his half eaten carrot stick and ran over to the giant window that took up the whole right wall. He pressed his hands onto the glass and stared out at the city in wonder. He stayed there for ten minutes, we just let him be. Then he hurried back to the table and started eating again, when he was done he sat in front of the window and just stared out into the city. He seemed to be okay with not watching us for a little bit which wad a good sign, he was slowly getting a tiny bit more relaxed around us.

"Clint do you wanna see the room you'll be staying in?" Nat asked,  
Clint looked at her suspiciously and stood up,  
"I thought I was only staying here for a bit, I don't need a room."  
"We have to keep you here until we can find your family and bring you back, that might take a while so we made you a room." Nat patiently answered,  
Clint stared at her and slowly nodded, Nat started walking to show him his room and he followed behind her. I followed after them with Wanda beside me as we watched to see Clint's reaction. He stopped and stared at the room, it was big and had a bunk bed in it with a slide going down, he had dark blue curtains and a purple rug on the ground which I recognized from normal Clint's room. He walked inside and stopped, he turned around and burst into tears.  
"What's wrong?" I asked confused,  
"I-I've never h-h-had anything l-like this before..." Clint cried as he smiled up at me,  
I stood there realizing he'd been crying from happiness, but this room wasn't that complex, it was a normal kids room. Did Clint not have toys or basic things in his room?  
"I just realized you never named your dog!" Wanda smiled,  
Clint looked down at his dog and smiled.  
"His name is Lucky!" Clint beamed looking right at me,  
I smiled and walked over, pretending to pet his dog. Clint giggled and right then and there I vowed to look after Clint, make him happy and to give him the childhood he never had.


	5. He's not so mean anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh I forgot to tell everyone that in this story JARVIS never died, so that might clear up any confusion.

I was sitting in my new room, new room until they found Barney, not knowing what to do. There was a chest in the corner that I had checked earlier and found toys inside but I didn't know how to play. I could only ever remember playing outside with Barney, not with toys. Maybe winter man will know what I can do, I thought he was a meanie but he's got a nice face underneath his mean face like Natasha. I got up and peeked out into the hall, no one was there, I slowly stepped out before a voice startled me.  
"Would you like me to notify Natasha, Clint?"   
I spun around trying to frantically find the person speaking.  
"Do not be afraid, I am a machine in the building, I am not real. I am programmed to keep everyone here safe and help anyone if they need it."  
I calmed down slightly at that and looked up, trying to see speakers.  
"N-no, do you know where winter man is?" I asked not sure if the voice could hear me,  
"Do you mean Pietro? He is in the training room, I can notify him if you want."  
I shook my head and nervously looked around,  
"Can you tell me where the training room is?" I asked,  
"... I can alert one of the others to bring you there, you are to young to travel around the tower by yourself."  
"Am not! I can do it, just tell me where it is!" I huffed angrily,  
"All right... go down the hall and turn left, I'll tell you the next instructions when you get there."  
I grinned, quietly creeping down the hallway, I scanned the hall for any people coming. I turned left and waited.  
"Next you go down this hall and turn right, you should see a elevator, I will open it for you and bring you to the floor that the training room is in."  
I continued down the hall and turned right, I saw a big metal door in the wall that opened into a small room. I walked in, unsure of what to do, then the door closed and I froze. It started going up and I gripped onto my sleeves tight. The doors opened and I stepped out looking around,  
"Next turn right and walk straight until you see a window that shows a big room with training equipment in it, I have notified Pietro that you are coming and he will be waiting for you."

I followed the voice in the ceilings instructions and came across a big window, I stood on my tip toes and looked into it. I saw Pietro packing things into a bag while he wiped his forehead. I looked at the door and figured out how to open it, I twisted the door open and slipped inside. Pietro was still packing and hadn't noticed me, I silently watched him for a few seconds and then crept over behind him. I decided to scare him as I got ready to shout at him.  
"BOOOOO!" I shouted putting my arms high to make myself look scary,  
Pietro jumped and spun around, eyes wide.  
"You scared Me! Your like a little spy!" He exclaimed,  
I grinned looking up at him,  
"So, why did you want to see Me?" He asked,  
I shrugged looking everywhere but him, not wanting to ask him how to play anymore.  
"Oh yeah? Was it to get tickles!" He said pulling me into him and tickling me,  
I shrieked, laughing as I tried to wiggle out of his grip. He lifted me up into his arms and spun me around as we giggled.  
"Stop!" I laughed,  
Then he held me like a baby and lifted me towards him, he blew on my stomach making me screech with laughter. Tears glistened in my eyes as my laughter rang out into the training room, I'd never laughed so hard in my life. I felt safe and happy which was something I'd never felt before. 

"Come on let's go see if we can find the others!" Pietro cheered twisting me around and onto his back,  
He walked out bouncing me as I giggled and pretended he was a horse I was riding, we went to the elevator and he pressed a big number I couldn't count up to. He was making funny horse noises that had me bursting into fits of laughter, then the elevator doors opened and I saw a big living room, the one I first saw the big city in. We walked in and I saw Natasha reading a book on the couch, she glanced up at us and I saw her face melt into a smile. I waved at her as Pietro made another funny horse noise that made me laugh. We gallaped into the kitchen area and I saw Wanda and Thor talking at the table, they stopped talking when they saw us. Thor grinned and Wanda placed her hand on her heart as if she'd just seen a beautiful sad movie, she smiled twice as wide as before.  
"Who did we find?" Asked Pietro playfully,  
"Wanda, Thor and Natasha!" I beamed, excited I'd learned everyone's names,  
"Yep. Let's see who else we can find!" Chuckled Pietro,  
"Good luck Clint!" Thor proclaimed,  
We set off into another part of the really big house and I saw Tony and Bruce the nice doctor in a big room with machines, they were talking to each other in big words I didn't understand but I heard them say my name.  
"Let's go do something else." Pietro whispered so he didnt interupt the other two,  
We walked back down the hall thinking of what we could do, then I got an idea. But I immediately said no, they wouldn't want me doing that, I'd just be a problem and a hassle for them.  
"Got any ideas?" He asked lifting me down,  
I shook my head, purposely not looking at him so he wouldn't see I was lieing.  
"Hey, you can trust me, whatever you want to do, we can do it. Within reason, were not setting anything on fire!"  
I laughed and nodded,  
"Can we bake?"


	6. Yep, I'm awesome

"Can we bake?"  
I looked down at Clint surprised, why was he nervous about asking to bake?  
"Sure маленький ястреб." I reassured,  
"What does that mean? What language is it?" Clint curiously asked,  
"It means little Hawk in Russian." I whispered in his ear, smiling,  
"Why did you call me a Hawk?"  
"Because you remind me of one, your always watching what's happening around you."  
"Like a Hawk?"  
"Yes, now come on, let's go bake!" I declared,  
We walked back into the kitchen and saw Nat had migrated in too and was talking to Wanda while Thor ate a pop tart.   
"What adventure are you up to now?" Asked Wanda,  
"Baking!" Clint squealed as he grabbed my hand pulling it to hurry me up,  
"I'm coming!" I laughed coming in and taking out my phone,  
I looked up different desserts to make and let Clint choose which one to bake.  
"I can choose any of these?" He asked wide eyed,  
"Yes, go ahead."

He scrolled through the list with pictures on a website I found when I saw his gaze linger on one of the pictures, I saw what it was and smiled.  
"Why don't we make the chocolate peanut-butter cake?"  
Clint enthusiastically nodded in excitement, not gonna lie this cake looked delicious! I looked at the ingredients and got them out, as well as bowls and measuring cups.  
"Can you measure three cups of flour and pour them into this bowl?" I asked handing Clint the measuring cup,  
He nodded and scooped out a cup of flour pouring it in, a bit spilt on the counter and he stopped looking up at me. He almost looked scared of my reaction.  
"It's okay, it's just a little mess. We can clean it up after, and you know I think the only way to have fun baking is to make a mess while your at it!" I soothed,  
He looked more calm after that and started measuring out the flour again, I saw him being a bit more careful though. I measured and added the sugars and butter together, mixing them with an electric mixer. Then I instructed Clint to add 1/3 cup of cocoa into the flour, he poured it in with the biggest smile yet. Then I added the eggs into my mixture and beated them till they were mixed in with the sugar and butter. Next Clint added the baking soda and the salt, which I helped him measure out. We pushed the dry mixture to the side and clint started to help me mix the wet ingredients.

"Now we have to melt the chocolate, wanna help?" I asked taking out the chocolate bars I found,  
"Yeah!"   
We measured out the chocolate and put them in a metal bowl, then we boiled water in the kettle and poured it into a pot. We put the bowl of chocolate in the pot with the water and watched as it started to melt. I saw Clint eyeing the chocolate disdainfully,  
"What's wrong?" I asked suddenly worried that Clint might not like chocolate (ha, like that would ever happen).  
"What is chocolate?"   
I blanked, not fully registering his question. Then it clicked and I 'ohhh'ed breaking a peice off,  
"It's really yummy, it's a type of treat. I know the colour doesn't look nice but try it, it's really Good!" I insisted giving him a piece.  
Clint took it and nibbled on the edge, then he paused and took a big bite. I laughed ruffling his hair affectionately as I stirred the melted chocolate.  
"The chocolates ready, next we ha- oi!" I laughed seeing Clint had sneaked another piece of chocolate into his mouth,  
He watched me closely and I realized he took it experimentally to see my reaction, I smiled at him and grabbed another piece myself eating it. He grinned grabbing another piece and I laughed picking up the chocolate and putting it away.  
"No more chocolate, you're about to eat a chocolate cake!"

Clint giggled and then helped me pour the chocolate into the bowl, he mixed it together while I poured in the vanilla extract. I stuck my finger in and licked it tasting the delicious batter, Clint glared at me and grabbed the bowl scooting it away from me. I reached over and stuck my other finger in, I booped the mixture onto Clint's nose as he gasped.  
"Oi!" He shouted as he grabbed the mixture and walked over to another counter,  
I couldn't help but hysterically laugh at his actions, just being with Clint made me want to burst into smiles and laughter all the time.  
"What in the world is going on in here, I've been hearing a lot of oi's and laughter!" Nat exclaimed,  
"He did it!" Sputtered Clint pointing at me,  
I fake gasped as Nat grinned,  
"Says the boy with chocolate on his nose!"  
"He ate it and then put it on my nose to make it look like I did it!"  
"All right... well I think it's only fair if I get to taste it!" Nat declared walking over to Clint,  
Clint grabbed the bowl and ran out of the room with a wild smile on him,  
"Oi!" Nat shouted, "bring back that batter!"  
"NO!" Clint yelled as he laughed,  
"May I have a taste?" I heard Thor ask,  
"NO ONE IS TASTING THE BATTER!" Clint shrieked as he ran back in,  
We all burst out laughing as I wiped tears from my eyes,  
"Okay, we won't eat anymore, I promise! Now let's finish this cake!" I relented,

We continued to bake adding in the peanut butter and all the other ingredients, Nat started to help as well. We mixed it all together and poured it into the pan, then we put it in the oven and set the timer. We sat down and waited for the cake to cook as it's delicious aroma wafted around the kitchen.


	7. Tastes like home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy thanksgiving everyone!

We finished making the frosting and I saw Clint stealing little bits of it when he thought I wasn't looking, I took the cake out of the oven and it looked PERFECT! I placed it on a chopping board where I took it out of the tin, then me and Clint started spreading the frosting all over the top. Next we took out Oreos and crumbled them on the top, we stood back to look at our masterpiece. 

"Can we eat it now?" Asked Clint,  
"Sure, why don't we go get the others so they can try it too." I pondered,  
Clint ran out of the kitchen and I heard him telling everyone to come try the cake we made, I heard lots of footsteps coming. Everyone came in and practically drooled all over themselves when they saw the cake.  
"Wow Clint! You did a really good job baking!" Steve complemented,  
"Yeah, yeah, good job squirt. Now let's eat!" Tony shouted which made Clint jump,  
Nat smacked Tony on the arm lightly as I cut up the cake, I made sure to give Clint a big slice since he was still so thin. We sat at the table and took our first bite, it was soft and moist inside and with the frosting it was heaven!  
"What do you think of the cake Clint?" Asked Bruce,  
Clint sat there thinking about what Bruce said before answering,  
"It tastes like home."  
I looked at him surprised,   
"What do you mean?"  
"Like it tastes... warm and nice. Just like a home."  
I smiled but there was something dark and twisted behind his innocent words, we finished eating and then Tony suddenly got an alert from JARVIS.

"Mr. Stark, there is a situation that requires all of your help."  
All of us turned to Clint who was glancing back and forth between us, uncertainly.  
"I think Pietro should stay with him, they seem to be getting close." Nat commented,   
Everyone else nodded so I sighed and nodded too, they all got geared up and left.  
"Who are you people, why do you wear weird suits." Clint said quietly as he stared at me,  
"Well... the truth is, we're superheroes!"  
Clint narrowed his eyes at me and crossed his arms angrily.  
"Just cause I'm four doesn't mean I'm an idiot! You guys aren't superheroes." He hissed angrily,  
I looked at him surprised, he admittedly, was a lot smarter than I thought he'd be for a four year old.  
"Look, I can prove it. I have a superpower where I go really fast!" I said,  
Clint cocked his eyebrow as if to say, I don't believe you. I grinned and started to run, as everything around me turned almost frozen. I ran out of the room and down to clint's room, I grabbed his stuffed dog and ran back to the dining room. I stopped and saw Clint staring at me with his mouth open, he slowly started to grin as he hopped off his chair and ran into me.  
"Oh my gosh you really are a superhero! You were a big blue streak and then you brought lucky! How does it feel to be so fast? Do the others have superpowers? Are they all superheroes? How did you become so fast?" He squealed,  
"Wow, wow, slow down! Yes the others are superheroes but not all of them have superpowers, like Natasha doesn't have any powers she's just a really good... uh, fighter!"  
Just like you, you're an amazing fighter just like her, I thought as I watched him with a smile.  
"What are the others superpowers?"  
"Well Tony doesn't have superpowers either, he's really smart so he built himself a cool superhero suit. But Wanda, my sister, has a bunch of powers like she can lift things without touching them, she can float and read minds when she wants to. Thor is actually a god! He comes from another planet but he stays here sometimes to help protect Earth. Steve is Captain America, he has super strength and is really tough. Bruce can turn into a big green...angry... ugh, thing. And well, I have super speed."

Clint was like a excited dog as he ran around the place shouting nonsense as he squealed and laughed, he jumped onto my back demanding that I go really fast when he was on me. I hesitated than grabbed him and swung him into my arms so he wouldn't fall off and I could hold him.  
"Okay you're gonna feel really dizzy and maybe a little sick okay?"  
"Yep, yep now let's go!" He shouted excitedly,  
I ran and everything went into slow motion around me, even Clint in my arms. He had a huge smile as the wind whipped his light brown hair away from his face, he was holding onto my arms tight as I ran. I stopped, thinking that was enough and set Clint down, he walked forward a bit, but veered sideways as he collapsed onto the floor. He started laughing as he lay on his stomach on the floor and I joined him, laying next to him.  
"That... was... AMAZING! let's do it again!"   
I laughed and shook my head in amusement,  
"I think that's enough for today, maybe we'll do it again tomorrow."  
We lay in comfortable silence until Clint started to fidget beside me, I turned to look at him and he looked slightly nervous.  
"What's wrong маленький ястреб?" I asked using his nickname, little Hawk.  
"I just wanted to say... that I wish you were my Dad."  
I lay there frozen as his words washed over me, I felt myself tear up as I smiled at Clint.  
"Oh Clint... that's one of the nicest things someone's ever said to me. But what about your real Dad?"  
He froze as a look of misery blossomed onto his small features.

"He... he's mean." Clint whispered,  
I looked at Clint worried, alarm bells starting to go off in my head. The bruises... the dirty clothes... malnourished.  
"Clint... what does he do that's mean?" I asked carefully, fearing his answer.  
"He... h-hurts me, sometimes doesn't let me eat for so long I can't remember what it tasted like. A-and he says m-mean things to me."  
Clint sobbed and I sat up pulling him onto me, I held him close and couldn't stop my own tears from falling. The man I called childish, reckless, hated because I thought he was annoying. The man I thought was a jerk and infuriating... He was abused and beat up as a child. He was half starved and grew up where there was no hope. I know a lot of the Avengers have horror story pasts, me and Wanda do too, but I mistreated Clint and made assumptions about him when I didn't even know who he really was.  
"I'm sorry Clint..."I whispered into his hair, quiet enough that he couldn't hear over his cries.  
We stayed like that until Clint calmed down, which took a while. Then I stood up with Clint nestled on my hip as we walked into the living room and I sat down and cuddled with him on the couch. I pulled a blanket over us and soon enough I heard Clint's breath become deeper and his face become peaceful. I wiped a tear from my face and gave Clint a kiss on the forehead.   
"I promise I'll make it right Clint..."


	8. Tasha

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: abuse

"Get back here you little fucker!"  
Heart pounding I ran up the stairs, Barney wasn't home. It was just me and Dad. I heard a bottle smash and then froze when a bottle soared just barely over my head and splintered into tiny green shards.  
"Don't you dare run from me you little piece of shit!"  
I started to run again and tripped, smashing my chin on the wooden step. I whimpered and then my blood ran cold when I was yanked up by my t-shirt, I was spun around to face my Dad's furious red face. His breath smelled bad and his eyes were wild and dangerous, he threw me on the ground as hard as he could and I started to cry from the pain and fear.  
"What are you, a girl? Men don't cry, you're no man are you? You're a weak little screwup that no one cares about. You are a piece of filth."  
I felt him kick my side and I cried out putting my small arms over my head. Then he punched me, over and over. I started to scream and lash out in wild terror, I felt him smack my face and something came bubbling out of my nose, I gasped trying to breath. I felt him hit my head so hard I saw stars. His fist raised in slow motion about to crash down into me.

My eyes flew wide open, I clutched onto my sheets as I gasped hard. It was a dream, just a dream. I sat up and started to shake, it was so dark. I couldn't see well.  
"JARVIS Don't tell them." I whispered knowing the nosy voice was gonna tattle tale,  
"Your heart rate has increased and you are in a state of panic, I must alert someone to come check on you."  
"I'll go myself." I whispered and shakily climbed out of my bunk bed,  
I walked to my door and opened it walking into the hall, the hall lights were all ready on and I looked around.  
"Where is... Natasha's room?" I asked quietly,  
"Go down the left hall and turn left, walk through the living room and into the elevator."

I walked down the hall in my dark blue PJs and through the spooky living room. I stepped into the open elevator and stood waiting for JARVIS to bring me to the right floor. The doors opened and I hesitantly walked in.  
"I have alerted Natasha that you are coming."  
"You didn't have to." I huffed,  
"It was required to insure your safety."  
I looked at the ceiling puzzled, Natasha wouldn't hurt me. I walked quickly and quietly through the living room and past the giant couch and tv, I walked into the kitchen and saw the light was on. Sitting on the counter looking at me was Natasha, she beckoned me over. I shuffled over and looked up at her, she then reached down and picked me up, setting me on the counter beside her.  
"What's wrong сладкий?"  
"What does that mean?" I asked,  
"That's a secret сладкий." She replied smiling the tiniest bit, "now, tell me why you are up at 2:43 in the morning?"  
"Memory. Bad one." I whispered,  
Natasha wordlessly wrapped her arm around me and I leaned into her touch, she gently started to rub my back which made me melt into her. We sat like that, side by side, as she gently rubbed my back and I started to feel sleepy.

"Why do you pretend to be mean?" I asked sleepily,  
She didn't respond straight away and I almost thought she wasn't going to.  
"When I was a girl, I didn't get to play or make friends, just like you except slightly different. I learned how to fight and protect myself. That is why I look mean, sometimes I am mean too."  
I thought about what she said and nodded,  
"If I was big like you I'd wanna be your friend."  
I felt Natasha stop rubbing my back momentarily but then continued on. She hummed and kissed the top of my head.  
"I know you would Clint... if you want you don't have to call me Natasha, you can call me Nat."  
I thought about what she said and smiled deciding a new nickname.  
"Can I call you Tasha?"  
"Yes... I think that would be okay."

Without another word I slipped into a deep sleep comforted by the warm arms around me.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the longish wait everyone, I'm currently working on 4 different fics so I'll take a bit longer to post than I normally do.😅

I stared out the window, my hands gripped the edge as the wind blew on my face. I was standing on my toy box with the window open and I slowly lowered myself out. I'd decided last night I had to leave, I didn't want to leave Pietro. I really loved him but Barney would be really worried about me and I don't want to make my punishment any bigger. I had to escape. I couldn't go on the roof or the elevator, JARVIS would block my access. But I might just be able to get away if I go through my window. I gripped onto the edge as my body hung millions of feet above ground. One slip and I knew I would die. I lowered myself down and onto the next window sill, I was so high up. I felt scared but I knew I had to do this. I started to lower myself to the next one but my fingers slipped. I screamed as I was flung downwards really fast, I managed to snag a ledge after I'd fallen for a few seconds. My body was jerked as I grabbed on and I howled from the pain that blossomed in my arms. A sob escaped me as I shook, I was gonna die. I couldn't do this, I cried into the building. My arms were shaking from the strain of holding my weight and the pain was to much. I heard a whoosh and was suddenly held safely in metal arms. I was shaking with my mouth open in a silent scream as I shut my eyes tightly. I felt myself being lifted into someone else's arms as they snuggled me in close.

"Clint what the heck were you thinking? You were gonna die!"  
I started to cry when I heard the angry tone of Tony's voice and clutched onto the fabric of the person holding me.  
"It's okay little Hawk, you're gonna be okay."  
I clutched onto the person that was holding me even harder when I realized it was Pietro. He rubbed my back slowly as we all stood there. I heard whispered conversations but was to distraught and traumatised to care.  
Then he picked me up and we started to walk back inside the tower, I felt like I was gonna throw up. I felt myself being gently put on a couch and I held a death grip on Pietro's shirt.  
"D-dont leave me!" I whispered desperately,   
His face cracked in sadness and heartbreak and he sat down beside me.  
"Clint, why were you trying to escape?" Tasha asked solemnly,  
I looked down at my lap and took a breath to calm myself down.  
"I wanna go home."

Everyone stood in silence until Tasha turned to Tony and Bruce,  
"It's time to finish the antidote."  
I looked at them confused but they didn't look back at me, Tony nodded and walked out with Bruce.  
"I don't wanna go... but I do at the same time." I said quietly,  
"What do you mean?" Poetry asked,  
"I don't wanna leave you guys. I love how tasty everything is here and how we're always having fun and my cool room. I love you but I miss Barney. I also don't want to make my Dad's punishment to me any bigger by staying any longer."  
We sat in silence until Pietro hugged me tightly.  
"I'm gonna miss you so much when you go." He whispered emotionally,  
I hugged him back tight.  
"I'll never truly be gone, you'll always have the memories. Just like I have the memories of my mom." I said smiling up at him,

I missed my mom, she was beautiful and kind. She always made me feel better on bad days. But I know she's in my memories, Barney said she's only really gone the minute we forget her.  
"You really are amazing, you know?" Pietro said quietly,  
"What do you mean? There's nothing amazing about me, I'm just a plain old boy."  
"You'll see." He said simply as he smiled with far away eyes, "you'll see."


	10. Bye...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, this is a pretty sad chapter... get the tissues ready. Anyway, pleaseeeeee comment! I really love comments on my other stories and it fills me with joy when people comment on my stories.

"He's finally asleep." Nat sighed closing Clint's door,  
After the events that happened today Clint was exhausted but had insisted on Nat bringing him to bed. I nodded and we walked back down the hallway, before we reached the living room Nat grabbed my arm.  
"Pietro... they finished the serum. They're gonna give it to him tomorrow."  
I crumpled on the inside, I was gonna loose Clint. The big Clint would be back... I didn't want to say goodbye to the little boy I had gotten to know so well. My time with Clint had been so uplifting and joyful. I had even started to feel... like a Dad. Is this how normal parents feel when there child grows up and moves out? All I knew was I was gonna make the most of the short time I had with him tomorrow.  
"You okay?"

I nodded and we walked into the living room where the others were, Tony was passed out on the couch after working on the reverse serum for so long. The poor guy deserved a break. Everyone was kinda quiet, reading or just thinking, even the tv was off for once. I think everyone is coming to grips of what's gonna happen, I know everyone will be sad to say goodbye but I also know some people missed the big Clint and would be happy to see him back. Nat for one, she didn't show it but she found it really hard when Clint changed. She said she didn't even want to be around him, but she did anyway because someone needed to comfort him. She only told me this after a rough mission that I had stayed behind on to look after Clint. Nat had been stabbed twice, she said usually Clint always had her back so she had needed to be extra careful which was hard to do after being with a partner for years and years. I understand her and Clint have a special connection with each other, but she obviously lost that connection when Clint was de-aged. I yawned and decided to hit the hay. I went to my room and crawled into bed, sleep quickly took me.

💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜💙

"Wake up!" Someone screeched in my ear,  
I felt a small body jump on me and I smiled into my pillow. Clint kept bouncing on me and when that didn't work he grabbed the pillow beside me and started whacking me with it.  
"Hey... I didn't notice you there!" I playfully laughed,

Clint just narrowed his eyes and smacked the pillow on my face as hard as he could. I laughed and grabbed my other pillow, a full on pillow fight erupted. I went easy on Clint and let him win most of the time, he was surprisingly good at pillow fighting. Then I accidentally knocked Clint off the bed and I gasped, frozen. Shit! I scrambled to the end of my bed and looked down, a pillow was shoved in my face as litfle giggles erupted. Clint jumped back on the bed as if nothing happened, which was weird since a normal four year old would have been bawling their eyes out if they fell off a bed. Then again, Clint wasn't a normal child. We kept playing till Clint was breathless and his face was red. Then we decided to play a game of hide and seek, I counted to twenty and started looking. It only occurred to me that Clint was a master of hiding fifteen minutes later when I still couldn't find him, I wasn't even allowed to get help from JARVIS as part of the game rules. I huffed, we had decided only my floor we could hide in so he had to be here somewhere. Where would I hide if I was Clint... duh, somewhere high! The vents! I looked around till I found a vent in the ceiling, wondering how he even got up there I grabbed a chair and stood on it twisting the vent grid out. I heard shuffling coming and saw Clints head look down at me with a massive grin.

"I won!"  
"You sure did!" I chirped,"How did you even get up here?"  
"That's my secret!" He smirked,  
I rolled my eyes and lifted him down, then Clint counted to twenty and I headed to my room. I hid in my closet, wanting it to be easy so he didn't get frustrated if I hid somewhere hard. He came In five minutes later and headed straight for my closet. He opened the door and looked down at me.  
"You're bad at this game." He commented,  
"I am, let's do something else."  
I glanced at the clock on my bedside table before leaving and saw it was almost twelve, when Clint would be turned back. My stomach rolled and I hurried out.  
"Clint... I gotta talk to you about something."  
"Okay." He said walking over,  
I sat down on the ground and he sat in front of me.  
"We found your brother and were going to be sending you back to him today. In... ten minutes."  
I saw tears well up in Clint's eyes and he lunged forward hugging me.  
"I don't want to leave you!" He cried,  
"I don't either." I whispered as my voice broke,

We sat there crying, as I hugged him close to me. I hated goodbyes, my whole life I had. Goodbyes ment you never saw that person again. I remember Steve saying once that goodbyes are only said to the person, never the memories. He would know since he lost the woman he loved and his best friend. It still didn't make it any easier, I looked at Clint's rosy cheeks that had lost the bruises and cuts we first found him in. He looked healthier and happier, How was I supposed to let him go back to his awful childhood? I wanted to keep him here, where he was safe and watch him grow up. Time was ticking though and soon I would loose this Clint forever, I pulled back from our hug and held him by his cheeks.

"Clint, when you go back you have to promise me something. Remember that it gets better, one day your Dad wont be able to hurt you. One day you'll have an amazing life full of people who love and care about you. You just have to hold on, promise me?"  
"I p-promise." He sniffled,  
I heard a gentle tap at the door and Wanda walked in, she gave me a sad smile.  
"It's time."   
I stood up and Clint reached up to me, I picked him up and he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and the back of my neck. We walked down to Bruce's lab and I saw Tony, Bruce and Nat waiting. Clint gripped onto me tighter as we walked in and I rubbed his back slowly. They had a bed set up for him and I noticed a needle with the reverse-serum in it. I placed him on the bed but he wouldn't let go of me, I decided to just sit with him.  
"I t-thought you were gonna bring me home?" Clint stuttered,  
"We are buddy, we just gotta do something first." Tony smiled,  
He pulled Clint's sleeve up and Clint's eyes widened, he looked at me with such scared eyes.  
"It's going to be okay драгоценный маленький мальчик." I hummed,  
"What does that mean?"  
"Precious little boy."  
Clint's lower lip wobbled as he smiled, I could see how grateful he was that someone truly loved him and it broke my heart.

I kept him distracted as they prepped him for the needle, he saw Tony pick up the needle and he burst into tears. I pulled half of him into me so he wouldn't see Tony inject the serum into him. Clint wailed as Tony pushed the needle in and I whispered encouraging things to him. I saw Tony push the serum in and Clint shuddered, then he groaned. Tony took the needle out and stepped back, I pulled Clint away from me and saw he had gone pale and was starting to sweat. I hoped to god this worked and didn't do anything bad to him. Clint gripped onto my sleeve and looked up at me.

"Don't forget me." He whispered before slumping in my arms.


	11. Chapter 11

All I could hear was a ringing and fuzzy noise fading and coming back again, my head was pounding like I ran head first into a wall. My muscles were aching as if I'd been stretched out and been put through a wringer. My throat was painfully dry and sore, I needed water. I tried opening my eyes a crack before shutting them from the blinding light that startled me, I heard the fuzzy noises start up again and heard them slowly turn into words and sentences. I opened my eyes the tiniest bit again and saw all the lights had been turned off, I felt two people gently lift me up by my arms and back but I was too exhausted to stay upright. My head sagged forwards when they sat me up and the only thing keeping me upright was someone's arms around me. The arms were thin and strong. Nat. My mind was like a mud puddle sloshing around but bits were coming back to me. I started to remember everything that happened after I ate the serum, me turning into a stupid four year old. Oh God... the things I told Pietro... They were true of course, at the time at least. I definitely don't see him as a Dad figure now, I'm more of the Dad figure. I looked up at Tasha sleepily and tried to focus in on her face. She gave me a brief smile before placing a cup of water against my lips, I greedily drank and the water soothed my throat a bit. I groaned and looked around, Steve was sitting beside Nat while Tony was passed out in a desk chair across the room.

"The reverse serum worked and as far as we can tell you're back to normal, you might feel the effects of the serum for a while though."  
"Bloody effects." I mumbled playfully,  
Nat smiled."good to have you back Barton."  
I stretched but immediately regretted it when my muscles burned and felt like they were catching on fire.  
"Easy there, don't want to be hospitalized longer than you have to." Steve chuckled.  
I sighed wondering how far I'd make it in the vents before JARVIS alerted everyone of my jailbreak. Not far likely.  
"Clint... you should talk to Pietro." Nat said seriously,  
"No, not right now." I muttered.

I wasn't ready to face him yet, after everything that happened. Everything I said and did, I wasn't sure if I'd ever be ready to face him again. I couldn't deal with the embarrassment of what happened, not to mention things Pietro learned about my past that I just blabbed out. Everything would be different between us, all of us. Everyone wasn't gonna forget everything I did as a kid easily. Especially Steve. I remember the sad and wistful looks he wore when he watched me play. The poor guy had wanted to settle down and have a family, but that had been ripped from him. He must be struggling to loose the one thing he had that was the closest he would get to having a family. Nat seemed to be glad I was back in her own way, I wasn't sure how everyone else felt since they were somewhere else.

"Hey, what's going on in that big head of yours?" Nat said playfully,  
"Did you just say I have a big ego?" I sputtered, "Stark has a bigger head than me!"  
Nat rolled her eyes and sat on the edge of my bed, only then did I just realize I was in a loose hoodie and jeans. I also noted that I had no t-shirt or... boxers on. I gave Nat a suspicious look as my cheeks heated up.  
"Who changed me?"  
Please don't say Pietro. Please don't say Pietro. I would die of embarrassment!  
"Relax, I did." Nat said with a wave of her hand.  
I relaxed at that, you might think it's weird that I feel safer that a woman dressed me than a man. I've known Nat for... ages though, we've seen each other naked before. On missions we often had to take showers together quickly (Not sexually you weirdo) and we had to dress each other's wounds that meant we had to take each other's clothes off sometimes. So I was glad that Nat was the one that changed me because I also knew she wouldn't take advantage of me, I couldn't say that for most people at S.H.I.E.L.D.  
"Clint!" Nat huffed,  
"What?" I asked obliviously,  
"I said that the others want to see that you're okay. And yes, Pietro too. You can't shut him out forever, you two got really close. It would hurt him if you just ignored everything that happened between the two of you."  
I flopped back on the bed and cringed at my aching bones and muscles, everything felt raw and stretched. I nodded and heard Steve get up to go open the door, everyone walked in and I forced a playful grin on my face. No matter how hurt I got I always cracked jokes and smiled. To try and convince people that I was fine and didn't need their sympathy or attention, the only person that saw through my act was Nat. I pushed myself up and swung my legs over the side of my bed, Steve opened his mouth to complain and no doubt mother hen but stopped when I shot him a look. The others seemed to relax slightly when they saw me back to normal and grinning like it was just like any other day.  
"Miss me?" I smirked trying to act how I normally did,  
I saw Pietro frown and step forward.  
"Clint, you're sure you're fine?" I could hear the confusion and sadness radiating off of him but kept up my act,  
I couldn't let them see how shaken and how lost I felt.  
"Fine, just a bit muddled." I laughed,  
Everyone made small talk for a bit obviously not really knowing how to act, eventually they started to leave one by one. Pietro was one of the last to leave and I saw his gaze linger over me before he quietly walked out and closed the door.


	12. Midnight run

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, excited for the next chapter!? Well I hope you're enjoying the story so far and please comment on things you'd like to see or change!

My feet bounced off the ground as my arms swayed beside me, my breaths were short and heavy. I was running outside in the dark, it was only 11:24. My thoughts were in a confused muddle and I did the only thing that made sense to me right now, a run. I wasn't using my powers, just good ol natural running. My tracksuit bottoms and skin tight t-shirt clung to me with sweat, my hair plastered to my forehead. I'd already been running for an hour non-stop and my feet were aching like a bitch. Everything was starting to hurt but I hardly paid any attention. When I was running everything just faded away, I didn't have to think or worry, which was exactly what I needed right now. 

The cool night air helped regulate my temperature somewhat but I was still hot. I rounded a corner of the park I'd came to at one point and saw a picnic bench. I finally stopped and all but collapsed on the bench, my heart pounding in my chest. I took much needed gulps of air and groaned, remembering why I'd even gone for a run in the first place. One word, Clint. I didn't even know what to think about him right now. We had started to bond, he can't deny it. There was definitely something happening, but then when he woke up... He acted as if nothing happened. It hurt, but there wasn't much I could do. If I was being honest with myself, I wished that me and Clint still connected. I wished things didn't have to go back to the way they were. 

My phone pinged and I pulled it out, it was a text from Steve.  
-How come you're out so late at the park by yourself?-  
I frowned at the text, how did Steve know I was here? Then I heard someone clear their throat, I spun around and saw Steve smiling at me. He was wearing a t-shirt and shorts with running shoes.

"Steve? What are you doing here?" I asked,  
"Same thing as you it seems." He chuckled, "getting some air and clearing my mind."  
I nodded and watched Steve jog over and sit beside me.  
"So, how are you doing? Ya know... with everything."  
"I'm fine, just... reeling."  
"That's understandable, you two did get close." Steve smiled,  
We sat in silence for a bit and I blew out a breath of air.  
"It really is a beautiful night, I should get out more." I mumbled leaning back and watching the stars,  
"Yeah... Hey Pietro, for what it's worth I think you should talk to Clint. You two have something special, you should pursue it."  
"I dunno... maybe. Hey, wanna run together?" I asked to change the conversation,  
"Sure." 

We both got up and did a small stretch to warm up again. We started jogging and my thoughts drifted away again, it was nice. A grin spread on my face and I sped up passing Steve.  
"Keep up Grampa!"


	13. A/N

Hey guys, I know I hav'nt updated in a while but I just wanted to say that this isn't dead! It's still very much alive and I've just been busy and have been trying to figure out which way I want the plot to go. If any of you have recomondations or even any kind words, that would be amazing and very helpful!

~Lily


	14. It's a beautiful night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! I was gonna post this yesterday but ended up deleting a whole bit I didn't like so it took longer. Thank you for the amazing comments and all the kudos and I hope you enjoy the chapter!

The cool night air blew across across my face. It was nearing the end of October, and the start of November. I was sitting on the roof of the Avengers tower and watching the beautiful sky beyond. Med bay had finally released me once they made sure there were no lasting side affects, I'd scampered out as fast as my aching legs would let me. So now I was seeking refuge in the therapeutic night air and constant city lights blinking all around me, it's a shame you can't see stars here cause of all the city lights. 

Suddenly a long, super fast blue blur raced by the edge of my vision. Pietro. He must have been out for a late night run. I sighed, running a hand through my light brown hair, that kid was the root of my problems. It wasn't his fault, if anything it was mine. I wonder what it would be like if humans didn't have thoughts, nothing to make things confusing and difficult. Life would be a lot simpler, that's for sure. I watched Pietro zoom around the edge of the city, a far away streak. Then it stopped for a while and he started making his way back to the tower.

"What are you doing up here? Stalking Turbo?"  
I jumped ten feet in the air from fright and spun around, eyes wide. Nat walked towards me with her signature smirk and sat down next to me.  
"Jesus Nat, tryna give me a heart attack?" I gasped,  
"I can't believe you, Hawkeye, superb eyesight and aim, can't even notice when someone walks up to you from behind."  
"Yeah, well that person just happens to be a highly trained assassin that walks like a cat stalking it's prey!" I defended myself jokingly with a small smile,  
"Oh, you're just jealous you don't have my feline beauty." Nat smirked flipping her short red hair,

I burst out laughing as Nat smiled, it was usually the closest she got to laughing. We sat in comfortable silence, it's something I love about her. She doesn't have the need to constantly fill up silences with small talk or any of that bullshit. One of the many, many, many things I love about her. I love that we're so similar, not in the normal everyday things but by our experiences. Before I joined S.H.I.E.L.D I did some terrible things... killed a lot of innocent people. Nat understands what that's like, to have done things and to try and fix them, to make it right. She grew up in an aweful place called red room, I don't even want to think about the stuff they did to her. She was made to do things against her will, she had no other choice. I feel the same from when Loki brainwashed me, I had no choice but to watch the things I was forced to do. Nat was the one who saved me in the end. She really is something. 

"So... are you actually stalking Pietro though? Cause I know you're falling for h-"  
"NATASHA! No I'm not... why would you think that!? He only just turned 18! Wait! That doesn't mean I like him! Wipe that look off your face, I don't like him!" I stumbled not expecting that to come out of her mouth,  
"Oh please... I'm one of the few people that can actually read you and what I just saw... well, he's technically able to date you. No judgements from me, the heart wants what the heart wants."  
"Uggggggh, Nat. Whatever happened to 'love is for children'? And anyway. I. Don't. Like. Him. Like. That!" I groaned,  
"Don't like who?"  
"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! How is so many people sneaking up on me today!?" I shrieked spinning around and feeling dread settle in me from Pietro's cocky smile,  
"Looks like your starting your mid-life crisis old man. Who's the guy you don't Like?" Pietro asked walking over,  
"I'm not an old man!" I muttered,  
"It's not who Clint doesn't like, we're actually talking about who he does like. Clint's just being a stubborn ass and denying it." Nat said nonchalantly,  
"Oh?" Pietro said curiously as he stood next to me at the edge of the building,  
I felt utterly embarrassed and mentally willed Nat not to say anything. I saw Pietro lean forward a bit to look at the ground below and felt panic rise in me, I almost grabbed him by the shirt and yanked him back so he wouldn't fall.  
"Sorry turbo, if Clint wants you to know he'll have to tell you himself."  
I felt eternally grateful in that moment, even though I don't like Pietro... I don't... I just didn't want him to think I liked him. Yeah, that has to be why.  
"Well, this was an interesting conversation but I'm gonna hit he hay. See you guys tomorrow." I said standing up and walking back inside fast but casually.  
I sighed, I'd talk to the kid about... What happened some day. Just not today.


	15. Photos

I watched the cars below, it was soothing. After Clint scurried off after I arrived I opted to stay out for a while longer, it's not like I had anything important to do anyway. Natasha was sitting on the edge of the roof, she hadn't spoken a word since Clint left. I wasn't sure how to feel about the woman, frankly she was quite terrifying. She was a lot more powerful and deadly than she looked. 

The wind blew softly across my face, brushing my long strands out of the way. I had been thinking of cutting my hair, I wasn't sure though. When I told Wanda she had flung a pillow at my face and told me if I cut my hair she would curse me until the end of my days. I'm not sure if Wanda can actually curse people but I sure don't wanna find out, so for now I'll keep my hair.

"Come sit down." Natasha said suddenly which scared me slightly,  
I looked at her for a few seconds before shrugging and sitting down a respectable distance from her.  
"I need you to be honest. Do you care about Clint? It can be in any way."   
"Ugh... yes?" I said, sounding more like a nervous question,  
"Good." Nat said with a tiny, tiny tiny smile.

Without another word she stood up and started walking back, just before she reached the door she turned around and raised her eyebrow at me. I looked at her in confusion, what, what was it? Then she motioned for me to follow and I clambered to my feet in realization. I walked after her as she led me around, I wasn't sure what was happening right now. She brought me to a room and closed the door behind us, I swallowed nervously.

"Relax, I'm not gonna try to murder you or something." Nat chuckled,  
"Yeah, yeah. I'm totally relaxed, so relaxed. Ok, let's do this... what is this? What are we doing?"  
"I wanna show you something, come over here."  
Obediently I followed after her and looked at what she was pointing to, it was... The wall. Hmm, very interesting. I heard Nat mutter something about teenagers and crouch down, she slot her fingers into a crack I didn't pay attention to and pulled. A section of the wall slid out and I stared, open eyed. Inside were envelopes, documents, pictures, letters and all sorts of things. Natasha reached in and pulled a stack of envelopes out, then she pulled a wad of photos.

"Come on, let's go sit down over there." Nat ordered as she went over to a couch,  
I followed and sat down beside her.  
"What are those?" I asked,  
Natasha took out a photo and showed it to me, it was a family of four. A Mom, Dad, and two little boys. One boy was standing in front of his mother that looked around twelve, the other was in his Dad's arms and looked around four. Their clothes were plain but clean, you could tell they weren't rolling in money.  
"Who are They?" I asked curiously,  
"That woman there, her name is Edith. That man is Harold. The boy in front of Edith is Charles, or rather Barney. That little boy is Clint."  
I said there, only just processing Nat's words, Clint... wait, Clint!?  
"You mean, our Clint?" I asked in shock,  
"Yes."

Wow, I didn't realize Clint had a family. Well, I mean obviously he did but still... They must not be around anymore. Clint's never mentioned them and I've never seen them visit Clint. I looked at little Clint, he was so tiny. His sandy brown hair and grey eyes peeking up from an innocent boys face. It made me wonder what happened to make someone like Clint become an Avenger. Something wasn't right with the picture, Clint's face wasn't smiling I realized, none of them were. The Mom had a lot of worry wrinkles and she almost looked... nervous. Barney looked at the camera with no emotion visible on any part of him. There Dad looked... strange. I couldnt put my finger on it, something was just wrong with the picture.

"Look at this one." Nat handed me a smaller photograph,

I saw a teenage boy with sandy brown hair grinning at the camera, it was Clint. He was holding a bow and arrow up and aiming at a target. It looked like he was practising in a field, he looked happy and bright. Nothing like the tiny child from the picture before. I saw a carnival being set up in the distance of the photo and the sun rising as it outlined Clint. Natasha handed me another photo, this one was of them together. They were significantly older than the last photo, Clint was an adult now. Him and Natasha were in a car, they were both smiling.

"We also found these a while ago, I was waiting for the right chance to give these to you and Wanda. But then Clint happened, so I'm giving them to you now."

Natasha handed me a few photos, I gasped when I saw the first one. It was me and Wanda, when we were six years old. We were playing on the floor of our room, I looked so different. My hair was the same brown as Wanda's and I had the same brown eyes as her. We were playing with wooden blocks, we weren't even looking at the camera. I looked at the next, it was a picture of Mama and Wanda together. She was teaching Wanda how to cook, I remembered that day. I looked at the next, I blinked in surprise. It was me and Wanda as babies, wrapped in blankets and sleeping. Mama and Papa were each holding one of us with giant smiles. I felt tears of my own glistening in my eyes, this was one of the most precious gifts I could have ever been given. I looked at the last photo. It was of... me and a boy. We were playing with a dirty ball in a park, I didn't recognize him. Was he my friend?

"I showed you Clint's photos so you could finally get your act together. You know all too well how easily people can slip through your fingers. How important they are, how you only realize you love them until they're gone. I don't want you to have to go through that more than you all ready have. Pietro, Clint's slipping through your fingers."  
I stared at Nat, mulling her words over. Was she right? Of course she's right... I did need to get my act together. To be fair really it was Clint who had to get their act together but whatever.  
"Yeah, you're right." I said standing up,  
I held onto my photos tightly and walked out, first of all I needed to show Wanda these photos. It was the only thing we had left of our childhood.


	16. A/N

Hi guys, sorry this isn't a chapter update.

I just wanted to say I just posted a writing competion today that anyone can join. If you're interested you can find it in my list of stories, this is open to any ages and any type of stories! If you want more details it explains it all there on the competition.

I hope to see some of you guys there!


	17. The confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short, also it would be amazing if any of you did join my writing competition! It would be so fun and... there's prizes!

My breaths were even as my hand positioned my bow, notching an arrow I pulled the string back. I pulled it back to my cheek and drew my elbow up and back, to keep my arms completely straight. Closing one eye and aiming I took my shot, letting go of the string. A loud thwack sounded across the room and I saw the arrow hit bullseye. I smiled, one of the most satisfying things was hitting my target dead on. That satisfying thump as it lodged itself into a target.

"Clint! Hey, Clint! I need to talk to you!" I heard Pietro shout bursting into the training room.  
I turned my bow around with the string drawn up, a smirk playing on my face. Pietro's face paled and he shot his hands in the air as if in surrender. He huffed and lowered his hands with a flop when he realized there was no arrow attached to my bow. With a chuckle a placed my bow down and walked over to him. My stomach rolled, I knew what was coming.

"Clint, I really have to tell you something! Look... whatever I did, I'm sorry. I don't know why we're so distant now, the truth is I wish we weren't. I... I care about you, and I don't want to loose you."  
Surprise whipped through me but at the same time a wave of anger flowed through my veins.  
"Yeah, maybe I am being distant. Maybe for good reason too. You have no idea what I've been through! I told you things you were never supposed to know! You expect me to just go back to the way things were when I was a toddler? Sorry to break it to you but that's not how it works! I can't just... hang out with you or do whatever you want to do after what just happened! I can't just ignore everything, say I'm fine and move on!" I snapped,  
"Yeah, I get it's hard but avoiding me for the rest of your life isn't gonna help! Don't you know the only way to fix your problems is to face them? To not run away? Well Clint, I'm trying to help! I'm trying to fix things but you won't let me!" Pietro scoffed,  
"I just can't okay? I don't know how to move on! I don't know how!" I yelled angrily,

I spun around, forcing tears back, I refused to be compromised. I felt him protest and follow me, at least he didn't make any moves to grab me, that would have ended badly.

"Clint please! We can work this out! We just have to work this out and talk it through!" Pietro pleaded,  
"Get lost." I groweled,  
"Fine, but we have to do it eventually! Please Clint, do this for me. Do you know what it's like to finally feel like I have a friend? Please, just think about it, we can get through this."  
I sighed. "Fine, I'll think about it if it will please you so goddamn much."

I didn't hear Pietros answer as I stepped into the elevator and closed the doors, pressing the button for my floor. I rested my head against the cool metal and closed my eyes, just breathing. Just existing, being there. God I'm so stupid, the kids right. I'm just too much a wimp to face him, no not face him. Too much of a wimp to face what happens to us after I face him. That's the real problem.


	18. Very important advice to thee

I felt awful. Pietro and Clint were fighting because of me. I tried to do something that would help the world, fix sicknesses like Steve had before the serum but it completely backfired. I wasn't even sure why to be honest. I understand turning into a kid and being vulnerable like that was hard to stomach but... It's getting a bit much. I know I'm being a hypocrite, I've done the same thing before but I'm... an enlightened being! I faced my demons and cut their heads off! Now Clint needs to face the kid and cut his head off! Metaphorically of course.

"Tony? You've been staring at the wall for half an hour, should I be concerned?" Bruce asked as he tinkered with his own tech,  
"What? It's only been half an hour? Jeez why'd you break me out of my trance, I was aiming for at least an hour." I joked as I stood up and flicked through Bruce's design templates,  
"What you making anyway big guy? A shirt big enough to actually fit when you hulk out?"  
"Ha ha."  
I grinned, getting my teammates riled up and annoyed was a favourite pastime for me, especially good ol Captain America. He was so strict and uptight, I wonder when the guy ever gets a break. I bet his idea of a fun night is eating a salad while reading a boring book about history, then to settle his old bones in a recliner and watch The Brady Bunch. It makes me shiver to even think of doing something that... old and healthy. I'm good with my burgers, pizza's and coffees.  
"What did the wall ever do to you to make it a target of your piercing gaze?" Bruce asked,  
"Well, for one it's totally the wrong shade of cream, I was thinking we should paint it something more interesting like... electric blue or burgundy. No actually not burgundy, ughhh, can you imagine? Hmmm, maybe a nice hot pink?" I rambled,  
"The day I let you paint our lab pink is the day pigs learn to fly. You know you only ramble when you've got a lot on your mind or you're nervous, what's going on Tony? You still hung up over the formula?"  
"It's just, I know experiments don't usually go according to plan. This has caused a huge damn problem though, makes me wish I hadn't even tried to in the first place." I sighed,  
"Tony, you're an inventor, a brilliant one. Yeah, things went wrong but that happens. If you hadn't of kept trying after you failed programming JARVIS then he wouldn't be here. Don't be hard on yourself, it's not your fault it didn't work, it's not your fault Clint fell on the formula. If anything, it's all butterfingers or Dumm-E's fault." Bruce consoled,

I knew there was truth to his words, I'm not that hard headed, but it didn't change the fact that what happened was because of me. I think it's time I apologize fully to Clint, I've been putting it off long enough.  
"I'm gonna go find Clint and have a talk with him." I told Bruce,  
"I think that's a very good idea Tony." Bruce replied with a smile.  
I walked out of our joined lab and up the stairs, I walked into the elevator and JARVIS whisked me up to where Clint was. He knew where I wanted to go, I didn't need to ask him since he'd heard our conversation. When the door opened I walked out and noticed I was in the training floor, I immediately headed to where we had archery targets that Clint practised on. I walked in and saw Clint standing on a ledge as he fired at moving target drones with mini guns on them, an effective training partner. Clint glanced over as he fired and hit on dead center without even looking, it always makes me so jealous how he can do that! It looks so cool.  
"What's up?" Clint asked as he continued to train,  
"Come down Legolas so I can tell you." I replied,  
Clint ran over to the wall as he ducked multiple bullets and pressed the off button with a scan of his hand. He then folded up his bow and placed it on his back in one fluid movement.  
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry Barton. I know me making that serum has fucked with you the most and now you're fighting with one of our teammates because of me. Trust me, I know what it feels like to be out of control and I'm sorry I had to put you through that."  
"Hey man, it's fine. Yeah I do blame you a bit but most of my beef is with the robot that ran into me. Also just... I just blame myself for becoming that open. My line of work makes us have to be secretive, quick minded and ready for anything. When I turned into a kid I just about blabbed every secret I had as a child to Pietro. That's what I'm really upset about, myself. So don't stress Tony, I know its not your fault."

I looked at Clint surprised, it hadn't even occurred to me that Clint would be angry at himself. Sure the team found out about Clint's rough path a bit but he must have told Pietro more. Wow... He really trusted that kid, and that's what he's not seeing.  
"Clint that's exactly why you need to talk to sonic, not because you have to exactly. Because you trusted him enough to tell him secrets you didn't want anyone to know, then you must have trusted him pretty darn well. Kids are actually really good at telling who's a good person or not, who they should trust. If you decided to trust Pietro then that's really saying something. There's something there, you need to go find the kid and tell him what you just told me. Because I bet Pietro thinks you're mad at him, so you should go make amends to something that could turn into a whole lot more."  
Clint stared at me as he thinned things over, I decided to leave him to his thoughts. With a friendly clap on the shoulder and a smile I walked out to leave Clint with my awesome words of wisdom.


	19. Finally

It was time. I'd put it off for long enough. I knew I was being an ass, but it was hard. I walked down the halls aimlessly, searching for Pietro but taking my sweet time. I had to tell him why, so he understood. So he knew it wasn't his fault but mine. My feet softly thumped on the ground with each step, my mind a mess and my eyes cloudy. My throat felt sore and I didn't even know why. I wondered how long I'd been walking, was I on the same floor? My hands were sweaty and butterflies were on a rampage within me. I felt too hot and itchy and too cold. Was I sick? Was it just my fear? Who damn knows. I saw everything clearly but it was like I wasn't really seeing things, my thoughts were consuming me. What do I say? How do I start? How do I open up and show years of suppressed emotions and feelings?

Then I saw it, not it, him. He was walking up ahead, on his phone with his head bent. Classic teenager. I wanted to run up to him and I wanted to run away. Instead I took one slow step at a time, conscious of my heart thundering in my chest. I wondered if he knew I was coming and was ignoring me. I'd honestly deserve it if he was. The kid glanced up and turned around, a look of surprise on his face. I continued walking forward slowly. What was I gonna do? What was he gonna do?

"Clint?" Pietro asked cautiously, as if I would bolt at any moment.  
"Hey." I replied as I finally stopped walking, a few feet from the kid.  
"Ughhh... can I help You?" He questioned,  
"Well, I was wondering if we could talk. About stuff." I internally smacked my hand on my head, about stuff? Ughhh, that sounded so stupid.  
"Oh, Yeah! Yeah, let's go talk. Where do you wanna go?"  
"I dunno, wherever you want to I guess." I shrugged,  
Suddenly Pietro super speeded over to me, he stopped and looked at me. I jerked my body back in surprise as he appeared beside me. Next thing I knew he had picked me up bridal style and was speeding somewhere. A scream left me as my body travelled a thousand times faster than it was supposed to. I may have enjoyed it when I got transformed into a kid but not when I was an adult. How the fuck did Pietro do this reguarly? Was it this fast for him or was it like everything for him was in slow motion? I didn't have anymore time to think about it before we stopped and I lurched forward from the sudden stop. Pietro lifted me down and I stumbled forward sideways, the walls bouncing side to side. I suppressed the urge to vomit as I fell over.  
"You Okay?" Pietro asked with a smile, "You liked it before."  
He was testing me, seeing how I was gonna react. How am I going to react? Who knows, my brain's probably a pile of mush by now.  
"Yeah well I was a kid, kids love anything that make them feel cool and like a dare devil." I retorted,  
Pietro smiled fully, he reached his hand out and helped me up. I finally got to look around to see where we are. We were in a spare room, a pretty boring one at that. None of Tony's fancy or expensive furniture were in here. There were also walls, not just glass walls but real walls. I looked at speedy in question.  
"Natasha showed it to me." He responded,

I tilted forward a bit and glared at Pietro. "Next time warn me if you're gonna abduct me and travel faster than a friggin arrow."  
Pietro smiled sweetly and walked over to the couch, I followed him and frowned when I walked into the side of it. Pietro laughed and I sat down with a huff.  
"You get used to it after awhile, Wanda did."  
"Yeah, well Wanda has weird voodoo powers that I don't." I grumbled,  
"So, we gonna talk?" He asked,

I sighed. "I guess so."

I looked down at my feet, trying to gather my thoughts and speak. Everything was all jumbled up in my head, I needed to get my act together. I felt a hand fall on my shoulder and I looked up, Pietro gave me a small smile.

"You know I told you some stuff. Stuff I didn't want anyone to know and... it's hard to deal with that. To deal with knowing I was in a weak position and I told you things that well, you know. Like, our job, what we do, what we stand for. We can't be weak, we have to be strong always. To persevere and do the best damn job we can. We're the Avengers, we can't turn into insecure little kids with daddy issues." I glared at the wall beside Pietro's head,

"I get that. But being strong doesn't mean being perfect." Pietro spoke, I looked at him in question. "I think strength is when you're scared, when you've done something wrong and you own up to it. I think it's when you face the thing you're avoiding and make peace. Do you think it was easy to deal with our parents dying from bombs Tony built? Easy that it was my decision to let Strucker test on us and torture me and my sister for years? Easy that we were hurting innocent people and helping Ultron? Nope, it was damn hard. But me and Wanda faced it together and worked through our trauma."

I was speechless, Pietro and his sister really had been through so much. We forgot about it sometimes because of how cocky and sure of himself Pietro was and how kind and caring Wanda was. They really had come so far, they made me look like a drama queen for making my trouble into a big deal. I think he was right, nothing was gonna change from the way I was doing things. I needed to man up, I can't believe two teenagers managed to get through that much shit, I sure could too if they could.

"Yeah... I can't imagine what you had to go through. I'm sorry pal, I seem like a real jerk right now." I chuckled,

"Clint, you're problem is just as important as mine was. There's no such thing as a worser experience, this could be the worst thing that's ever happened to you and to you it could be just as painful as what I went through."

"Trust me, this is a walk through the park compared to what I've been through. It's funny, I've been through worse and hav'nt been this badly affected and then this comes up and everything's messed up. Makes you wonder, ya? I dunno, everything's just confusing. I'm confusing, you're confusing, my feelings are confusing." I groaned,

"Okay, just don't think then. Clear your mind and focus completely on your emotions." Pietro offered,

I gave him a look that said 'really?', Pietro just nodded and I sighed. I muttered about hippie shit and feelings and I saw Pietro crack up. Closing my eyes, I focused on my thoughts. I acknowledged each one before getting rid of it from my thoughts, I continued with all my racing thoughts. Eventually I focused on nothing but the swirling mountain of feelings that threatened to drown me. I picked up pieces of emotions and searched for others.

"I feel relieved that I've finally talked to you, happy that I can put this behind me. Angry at myself, sad at everything we've been through, fearful. Tired... scared."

_love. I feel love._

"Anything else?" Pietro asked,  
"I feel a mix of overwhelming emotions, everything is strong." Unwanted tears started to brim in my eyes,  
I blinked the tears away, I hadn't cried in years and I didn't intend to now, not on front of the kid. Maybe this was the real root of my problems? I had suppressed my emotions for too long? It was more then likely. The tears returned in a wave and I grew scared that I wouldn't be able to push them back. I felt Pietro take his hand off my shoulder, only to take hold of my hand tightly. He started to rub circles on my back and I thought bitterly how wrong it was for a young adult to have to console someone so much older and more experienced then them.

"Clint... it's okay to cry." Pietro spoke softly.

I broke. My walls crumbled around me and the tears started to flow freely down my face. His soft words had pushed me over the edge, a sob coming out of me as I shook. Years worth of pushed back tears came escaping out in a mess. I gripped onto Pietro's hand as he continued to rub circles on my back. I hunched over to hide the tears streaming down my twisted up face, I wasn't ready for him to see Me like this.

"It's okay... just let it out." Pietro murmered,

Ugly cries escaped me as my whole body shook, I felt surprised when I felt Pietro's hand shaking in mine. I looked up to see Pietro crying silently, eyes lowered as his pale face became splotchy. I sat back up slowly and all but crumpled into Pietro, we wrapped our arms around each other and held on tight. Pietro buried his face in my shoulder and I heard his own cries breaking free. I would never forget this day, neither would Pietro. We both unravelled before each other and just cried. Just let go for awhile and let our emotions be free. A part of me felt free, like a breath id finally released. Like a piece of me I'd always been holding back had risen and started to shine. I felt okay... everything was gonna be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was quite difficult to write, especially since its very close to my own problems...  
> Pietro and Clint really needed this, they can finally start to move on from everything.


End file.
